Sloane Green

eating disorder recovery coach

Individual & Family Coaching

Writer

Flexing Your Muscles to Make It

How are you leaning into your word this year?


You know, it's a tricky thing... I've asked you to choose a word that challenges you. But it's not very natural to DO those things that are hard/scary/sure to fail.
Along with that, I've asked you to pick a word that actually has worked for you in the past. Maybe it's only happened a handful of times, but the point is that IT'S POSSIBLE for you to be/feel/do that.

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Whatever your word is, & whatever you want that you currently do not have, you're asked to be challenged, & there is likely some doubt there. Normal. So, there we have another obstacle:

Not only trying to achieve some sort of "newness" through your word, but also overcoming the doubt you have in achieving what you hope for.

Many people have expressed concern about CONFIDENCE to me, in some aspect of their lives. Confidence to succeed. Confidence in your work. Confidence to love yourself. Confidence that your relationships will last & thrive. Confidence that you will not disappoint anyone... and so much more.

Because I'm (okay, have been) an athlete much of my life, and maybe you can relate too, I'll tell you how I think of challenging myself & confidence, in general.


Confidence is like a muscle.

When we begin working any muscle, at first, we feel pretty weak. We think, "I'll never get there."
This is low confidence perpetuating low confidence, by the way!

But the key is to keep going. Notice that it's hard, and it's temporary.

You start by trying. Not that it's easy, but you try anyway, because you said you wanted it.

You work your muscles slowly- lower weight dumbbells, less repetitions, fewer times per week... and increase one or more until you feel a little more confident in your process, that trying leads to results. Yes, it's the process we must pay attention to, not the outcome.

Each day will look different, and will present its own challenges; the end goal doesn't change, but how we get there will. So, we look to today's muscle-building plan.

Same goes with confidence. I'm a big believer in "fake it 'til you make it." Sure, you're not confident now, but if you were, what would that look like or feel like? If you did have confidence, what would you do differently? And then try it... even if you're scared... even if you don't feel ready, or comfortable. Take the very first step. Process.

Fake it. Then, when you strengthen your confidence muscles, you'll learn what makes you feel more confident, you'll have proof that you thrive on it, & finally, you'll make it.

You'll see.

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