I want to talk about a topic I think a lot of people relate to:
s h o w i n g u p
Showing up, especially when we don’t want to. Showing up and not knowing where it may lead us.
You’re thinking, “Hey Sloane, I’m at work. I came here and I showed up. What more do you expect?"
But are you excited about being there? Do you jump out of bed ready to show the world what you’re there for? How about in other areas of your life?
If so, Hooray! Good for you! Keep kicking butt!
But, the reality is that most of us show up when we want to, or when we’re forced to. The rest of the time, we’re coasting on a road we may not want to be.
Let me tell you a story. Maybe it will be a little more clear.
When I met my now-husband, I really was in no place to date him. That sounds terrible, because we were dating. But I went into it thinking, “This might be fun, but if it doesn’t work out, then, meh.” I thought I could get by just on surface-level engagement.
My husband, on the other hand, greeted me every day as if I were the only who could turn the sun on. He would want to know more about everything about me, because he knew it was important for me to be really heard. He always (always!) wanted me to be a part of his day, so he made it happen. He showed up for what he wanted his life to be.
I can’t say I did the same, in any area of my life.
While I wasn’t showing up with him, I found my life frustrating, because I wasn’t showing up in other areas of my life. I was applying to jobs half-assed, not committing to my friendships, not really following through on the person I said I wanted to be. I was frustrated at myself and because of myself and didn’t know how it got to be that way.
Now that we’re married, we talk about it, and guess what? He knew I was absent. He knew that I wasn’t committed to him or even being there with him. And while my body was there, I wasn’t really showing up to be with him. Like really. You cannot hide these things. I hate that!
I think about this beginning with my husband, because I love him so much now. I adore him, and would do a lot of crap I don’t even want to do, for him.
But that’s what showing up is. The inconvenience and hassle of life goes away when you have a perspective shift.
I am sure he didn’t want to drive 40 minutes, but he did want to see me, so he did it anyway.
I am a big-picture thinker. I want things to happen now. I have a hard time thinking that I need to do x, y, and z first. But in order to have these grand dreams come true (they can!), you gotta show up for everything. Even those things you think don’t matter: oh, they do matter.
Things will never be perfect. But if you want until they are and then you’ll show up, I’ll tell you from experience that you will watch your life go idly by, frustrated and defeated.
Showing up even when you don’t want to, and in spite of not wanting to, shows character. And character is who you are when no one is looking, and who you’ll show when everyone is looking.
Now that I’m a bit wiser (perhaps from having such a patient and graceful husband), I want to show up for life as if I’m showing up for a hot date with my future. I’m going to get dressed, revive my energy, and try really, really hard to do my best.
I’m showing up as if that thing I’ve always dreamed up finally happened today. Because it is happening today.
If you act this way, live out loud, design your mindset and perspective and actions to meet these dreams, doing those sucky everyday actions won’t seem so… sucky.
Showing up means meeting the life you’ve always known you could have.
I’m curious: What does showing up mean to you?
I’d love to hear!
Send me a message we can continue the conversation. Let’s design your actions to show up every day!